


forever falling

by 1224



Category: Lucifer - Fandom
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Childhood Trauma, F/M, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:01:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25429603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1224/pseuds/1224
Summary: god comes to visit his son in the city of angels, lucifer revisits his trauma, and he desperately finds the right person to run to.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Kudos: 10





	forever falling

**Author's Note:**

> yeah this is my first fic and i have zero clue on how to do any of this BUT- i hope you enjoy whatever this is.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> god! god is here and oh man, does he work in strange ways

he stood on the balcony as he held his whiskey glass above hundreds of feet in the air as the view of los angeles and its twinkling lights started to blur through his watery eyes. 

his father had decided to come and visit him on earth and tonight was the first night he decided to have a little chat with his son. 

“samuel, i sent you down there for a reason and it’s been billions of years. can’t you just let it go by now? you’ve made it your own and it’s common nature to you isn’t it?” lucifer scoffed. in fact he let out a laugh, a nice and grand laugh. 

he choked back tears, turned around and said to him, “father you never disappoint me do you. in fact, it’s a great feeling to have, but never a feeling you could have towards me isn’t it.” he gripped his glass tighter while trying hard not to shatter it. 

“son it was for the best, it was for you to learn and grow, if it never happened you would’ve never been here. don’t you know that?“ he then stood up to meet eye to eye with lucifer as he held his face in his hands.

“i’m proud of you but you have to come to terms that this was all just supposed to happen.” lucifer could barely look at him but the more he looked into his fathers eyes, the more memories came rushing back. 

it’s been millions of years since he last saw his father and he suddenly remembered everything from heaven. every single guest he’s come across, every laugh he had with his family, every star he was able to create and even his favourite hidden passageway that led to a waterfall he liked to bring and show new residents too. 

he kept staring deep into his fathers eyes and although his words went out one ear out of the other, he started to see and remember when it all came crashing down. he remembered his first argument he had with him and he also remembered the first time his siblings went against him. he snapped out of it as he started to pay attention to what his father was talking to him about at that very moment. “son, i promise things will change from now on.” his father said to him as he laid both of his hands on his shoulders and squeezed. it hit lucifer right then and there. he felt as if he was right there all over again. it was the same words his father told him before he fell. 

he swore to him that things would change with the most optimistic look and smile on his face and that their argument wouldn’t change a thing. all little samuel did at the time was smile back and nod, fully convinced that everything would go back to normal.

lucifer was deep in his head and he went right back to his fall. he was crying and screaming and all he could do was let it happen. everything became dark around him and it was getting hard for him to breath. he was suffocating and nothing could save him. he saw each feather from his wings flutter away again and all he could do was try and savour the last bit of light above before it all went dark. 

he snapped out of it and didn’t even realize it was all just in his head. he found himself on the floor with the glass cup he was holding shattered with whiskey split all over his leather couch and floor, wondering if he was sweating or crying, gasping for air and trying to get a hold of his breath. his father didn’t even try helping him and all he did was look directly at him with a smile and said. “son this is all part of the plan.” 

lucifer tried to bring himself back to the real world as he looked over to the elevator. he felt so weak and so powerless but he knew he needed to leave. he had to be anywhere but here in the same room as his father. he didn’t know how he could still have the same personality and mindset. lucifer was right back to who he was was as a child after his fall. he felt small, breakable, and as if he could fall apart from the slightest touch. all the years of building himself into “The Devil“ didn’t mean anything at this point. he couldn’t bear to even show anger to his father, he was numb to it all by now. 

he got up slowly brushing some of the broken glass off of his shoulder and briskly walked without saying a word. “samuel! where are you going?” he asked him as he grabbed lucifers shoulder and pulled him back. lucifer turned around with shaky yet firm hands and forcefully grabbed his fathers hands off of his, looked him straight in the eye and said shakily, “anywhere but here. don’t come back. please.” 

he entered the elevator as his father let him be while he watched the door close as he saw the last glimpse of his son. lucifer didn’t know what to feel at all but seeing his father smirk at him after all that’s happened did not sit well with him at all.

god smirked all alone in the penthouse he himself planned out for his son to have as he knew exactly where he was headed. “i really do work in mysterious and cruel ways.” he thought to himself but knew it was all for the best.


End file.
